My inspiration for finding my life outside of law is my friend TD. She’s single, 30, works a TON, yet seems to have an awesome life outside of being an attorney. I’m sure you’re thinking, 30 + single, of course she does. But no. She works very hard making sure she does all of the things she loves and dedicates the same energy to them (and demands the same respect of them) as our friends with kids. She is my HERO in this respect. She knows what she loves and she makes time to do those things on a daily, weekly and monthly basis. And, with a few exceptions, she seems really good at leaving the 6 minutes at work. Instead of, as B says, stealing time, she cultivates her time so it’s full of everything she loves.
Of course, my favorite thing in the world is spending time with B. We share so many common interests and loves (except for shopping and exercise (my love/my dislike), B is a given. These are some other things I love and want to cultivate presence in:
– Ignore the rust on the white post (I’m working on it!) I have a billion lilies, iris, tulips, roses, and other perennials. I am mediocre at vegetables, decent with bushes, shrubs, and trees, but great with flowers. And a love them. I try to think of every year as adding another layer. This time of year is hard, because it’s breaking down and getting ready for next year for me, but I love the de-stressing and exercising gardening gives me.
2. Classic Movies (and collecting Classic Movie Posters)
These are all original issue posters B and I own and our house is basically a shrine to them. Not only do I love these works of art, but I love the movies of the 20s through mid-60s more than any others. (Modern British films a close second). Give me a classic Hollywood actress and I may feel like my time is my own. Even more, give me a wall full of classic movie art. LOVE it!
I am a voracious reader and have been since I was a very small child. I read almost everything, listen to books on the way to work, and plow through my favorite authors (who are by no means represented here). One thing I HAVE done since I started practicing law, was set annual reading goals. I discovered in law school that when I don’t read daily, my life belongs to someone other than me. I have a crazy active goodreads account and even discovered one of my BEST friends (Hi! Mox!) through goodreads. Like Jonathan Franzen said, literature is my religion. Which is not to say I am a complete snob – I love YA dystopias, LGBT coming of age stories, tales of southern women, and well-written modern mysteries.
If literature is my religion, cooking is my church. I am a foodie, but not a food snob. I love cooking everything from the most simple tomatoes, pate, and summer salad to Julie’s Beef Bourguignon, standing rib roast or subtle roasted fish. For years, cooking was the way I maintained my creativity and now it’s the way I connect with my family, spend time with B, and celebrate the seasons and special occasions. I knew things had gotten bad when I started to resent cooking. But chili is simmering now and I feel a bit better already!
I. Love. Fashion. Shopping. Design. Clothes for work, play, and dress up. Bags. And especially shoes. It’s not just the hunt, but the feeling I get in a look that works. Confident. Powerful. Playful. Which is another reason why I am on my mission. I want to fit into the clothes I love, but also see them in context. Six minutes really makes fashion feel utilitarian and often makes me flip sizes faster than an SAT vocab prep.
6. Everything Else
I have many other loves – art, music, some kind of physical activity, but I don’t seem to devote any time to these on a regular basis. So part of my mission will be finding and cultivating the things I adore. Until then, I had a good Sunday, notwithstanding a headache and an icky feeling. I played Wii Monopoly with B, messaged with friends, made chili and am watching movies. I have miraculously managed at least part of a day without stolen time. So cheers to that!